2000 Jaguar XK

Convertible

4.0 litre supercharged V8

Automatic

sajja42b2ypa10561

Clear

Gasoline

Rarely in history does a vehicle of this import come to market at a price which is affordable by the average connoisseur of fine automobiles or collectors. Today is such a day my friends, please mark it in your diary as the day you will pounce upon the opportunity that life has bought your way, or the day that you let indecision and procrastination rob you of the chance to make your way into the annals automotive history.For sale today is this incredible specimen, crafted from rare minerals excavated from the rarefied earth surrounding Stone Henge and artfully constructed by a team of wizards from the Hogwart school of automotive design. Hailing from the Empire of Great Britannia, the Jaguar XKR has been known the world over as the only car to own and drive if you are serious about milking every last drop of satisfaction and joy that life has to offer. Indeed it has been referred to as the most important vehicle to transport human kind since the charriot carrying Zeus pulled up to the valet parking station at the Parthenon.If you are in search of a vehicle to not only perform the utilitarian task of taking you from one location to another, but to do so in a suave and sophisticated manner befitting only the most James Bond or Pussy Galore'esque among us then this my friends is the vehicle for you. But before you read on let me forewarn you, this is not a vehicle for the feint of heart or weak of constitution. To drive this elegant roadster you must be willing and ready to accept adoring looks and accolades normally reserved for royalty. For far less than the cost of a pedestrian Hyundai or Kia, you my friend can pick up where I left off and pilot this masterpiece of automotive excellence around the streets of your home town. I would dare say that where you have been conditioned to think that the best day of your life may have been the day you were born, married, divorced, became a parent or found Jesus, all of that is about to change for the lucky person who wins this auction and this becomes the most storied and greatest day of your life.Let me share with you some of the indisputable facts about this glorious XKRFact. This car was driven by Prince Harry whilst in Las Vegas during the "casino scandal" which resulted in photos of him in the buff. He had been fully clothed prior to having a pack of wild women rip his clothes from his body as a result of pulling up at the VIP entrance in this XKRFact. This car was cast as KIT in the famous Knight Rider TV show however due to the fact it had not been manufactured yet, it was passed over in favor of a less intelligent modelFact. This automobile was built to celebrate the turn of the century and was in fact cited by management of Jaguar as the single best day of the entire history of the company.Fact. When I drive this through the drive through at Starbucks the staff as so enamored with the XKR they routinely forget to ask for my money in payment and instead offer to have my baby.Fact. I lent this car to my friend to drive to his job interview and the employer gave him his resumeFact. One day I reversed into a pedestrian in the car park at AJ's and he thanked me, I still receive a Christmas card from him and photos of the graze on his kneeFact. This car goes so fast that it doesn't have to, everyone just knows it can.Fact. The cars engine which was milled from a single block of rare plutonium and fed by a supercharger which produces over 370 horsepower.Fact. The black leather seats (thrones) were made from the hides of cows who volunteered for the honorFact. The stereo system refuses to play country and western music - period ... don't even ask.Fact. The windscreen washers are filled with the tears of the Virgin Mary and wash away road grime and sin.Fact. This vehicle has graced thousands of souls with its presence during its 86,000 mile victory lap.Fact. The polished alloy wheels are so rare that not one other car in the universe has these exact same wheels and the sun glistening from them can be seen in space.Fact. The black paint was mixed with the ash of Mother Theresa and it wears a coat of goodness that will compensate for all of your evil doingsFact. The custodian of this XKR must swear by a solem oath to care for and protect it with their life. Fact. This car has been looked after better than my young children who sleep in the garage while the car rests in their former bedroom. Fact. I know of no issues with this car which would make it anything other than a wonderful addition to your life.If all of these features are not enough to have you feverishly punching in a bid then I fear you must be looking for vehicle which will confine you to a life of mundane dissatisfaction.For all others the race is on - who will be the new bearer of good news and driver of the most awesome XKR ever in the history of the entire universe and beyond?